Building a Relationship

Carl Rogers in On Becoming a Person discusses building a relationship. The first step in building a meaningful relationship is to be genuine. This sounds simple but it is not. We often project something we want another to think we are. But this false projection dooms any hope of building a constructive relationship.

To be genuine I must be aware of my feelings. I express the feelings and attitudes that exist within me. “It is only in this way that the relationship can have reality, and reality … [is] deeply important as a first condition [of a meaningful relationship]”. Carl Rogers, On Becoming a Person (1961).

Rogers said this over fifty years ago. He was right then and his words remain true today. Drop pretense, be yourself and allow yourself to be real in relationships. You will go beyond a false facade into a meaningful relationship.

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